My Own Fallibility

I know that I'm only human and I make mistakes, yet each time I do, I'm scared solid. When I say solid, I mean frozen. I panic, I shut down, I shout at myself wondering how I could have been so stupid etc.

Now the challenge is, these are mistakes that cost somebody something, right? If they only thing they cost is me to lose face, I'm fine with that. I can go back and be shouted at and explain that I personally made a mistake, that's all fine.

I know I'm not alone in this, and I hope I will never make a mistake that ends my career, but how do you prevent making the rather large ones? At present, there's enough and more blame to go around but some of it is rightfully mine. And I care about having it fixed. Unfortunately, we cannot have it fixed, because to do so would need the other side to be 'gracious', something that they're not inclined to be. And may never be inclined to be.

I'm concerned, and nervous, but apparently I'm not alone in this. Google has 32 Million results for 'leaning to cope with making mistakes'. More importantly, I have to remember that the voice that shouts at me, is not my conscience, it is my ego.

My conscience is clear, I missed this thing, but I did a lot, I covered a lot, I took care. Maybe someone else would not have missed this, but I did. And hopefully, I never will again.