Roger Federer is now in the Australian Open Finals!! Though this may not affect anybody else personally, it affects me. I care that this man, who had an appalling year last year, has come back to win the quarters and semis in straight sets. Now let's watch the finals.
In other news, my brother's been 'let go' from his job. He's in the US and his employer has been forced to cut jobs. It is shocking to have this happen to someone I know. I know things are bad out there, people are losing jobs and all that, but I honestly didn't expect someone I know to be affected. Especially someone who was told by teachers that he 'would go far in life'... I'm slightly afraid for my brother.
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Sunday, January 18, 2009
Free Flow
I'm in a meeting on a Sunday afternoon. The discussions going on don't interest me in the slightest so I'm listening to music. It's strange when there is a room full of conversation going on that you cannot hear. And what you're listening to flits across your face. I wonder if anybody else is looking at me, so I look up. I catch your puzzled eye, wondering what I'm thinking. Why I look excited, then wistful, then the secret smile.
The world is a scary place, we're so much 'out there'. I give my all to my work and the people I work with - well, if I like them. I don't lie, I don't hide, I don't pretend. I expect the same from them and most often I get it. Scary because if we're seeing each other more than family... we become closer to each other than family sometimes. This is not a bad thing, just a sad thing.
Its at times like this that I miss SO a great deal. I don't want other people knowing what I'm thinking and feeling, trying to keep me entertained or cheer me up when I've had a rotten day. So far, I've managed to not let that happen, but this week was bad. A few days ago, I was very unjustly accused of not doing my job well enough. I was wounded, to say the least. I had to keep a professional air about it and I did for the most part. I cried my eyes out. But my colleagues didn't see that part (well not everybody). I could have looked to my colleagues, and if I was angry with SO for being distant I might well have, for support and reassurance.
This time, given the way I'm feeling about SO, I walked away, called him and bawled like a baby. It was amazing how much I cried, first time I've ever cried like this about work. Hopefully the only ever time. I've been upset because of mistakes I've made, but not offended violently because of an undeserved comment.
I miss my husband!
The world is a scary place, we're so much 'out there'. I give my all to my work and the people I work with - well, if I like them. I don't lie, I don't hide, I don't pretend. I expect the same from them and most often I get it. Scary because if we're seeing each other more than family... we become closer to each other than family sometimes. This is not a bad thing, just a sad thing.
Its at times like this that I miss SO a great deal. I don't want other people knowing what I'm thinking and feeling, trying to keep me entertained or cheer me up when I've had a rotten day. So far, I've managed to not let that happen, but this week was bad. A few days ago, I was very unjustly accused of not doing my job well enough. I was wounded, to say the least. I had to keep a professional air about it and I did for the most part. I cried my eyes out. But my colleagues didn't see that part (well not everybody). I could have looked to my colleagues, and if I was angry with SO for being distant I might well have, for support and reassurance.
This time, given the way I'm feeling about SO, I walked away, called him and bawled like a baby. It was amazing how much I cried, first time I've ever cried like this about work. Hopefully the only ever time. I've been upset because of mistakes I've made, but not offended violently because of an undeserved comment.
I miss my husband!
Friday, January 09, 2009
Johnny Cash
And this song called Hurt - http://in.youtube.com/watch?v=SmVAWKfJ4Go&feature=related
A colleague sent a bunch of us this. It's a Nine Inch Nails song (http://in.youtube.com/watch?v=gjwgYvzQWS4). It is Johnny Cash's confession. His telling God that he repents, and now he's ready to die. This is all I'll say because anything more makes it less.
A colleague sent a bunch of us this. It's a Nine Inch Nails song (http://in.youtube.com/watch?v=gjwgYvzQWS4). It is Johnny Cash's confession. His telling God that he repents, and now he's ready to die. This is all I'll say because anything more makes it less.
Wednesday, January 07, 2009
Why I love being Married
So I never thought I'd get to this stage, but here I am. I'm away from SO again, but just before I travelled, I spent about 10 days almost completely with him. I had just come back from one trip and a few days of work which were rather harrowing but the upside is that it was very Honeymoony. I was just so happy to be with him that I didn't fight with him at all. I think we made it through the entire period with only him getting angry with me once. And I absolutely loved it.
To my mind, this is what a Honeymoon would be like. You spend time just being with that other person, when you're at a stage that you're happy to be together, enjoying each other's company. No other stresses, no tensions apart from what to do for the day (in our case where to eat). I loved it and I love him. I also think this is why Honeymoons are important, they help the couple bond as a couple. To understand what they mean to each other and how they think about certain things. I've not had this time with SO in a really long time. We try on weekends and stuff but the growing together takes some concerted time and bonding.
And so now, we're an 'us'. We have opinions, we have likes and dislikes, we also have fights but at least 'we' exist.
To my mind, this is what a Honeymoon would be like. You spend time just being with that other person, when you're at a stage that you're happy to be together, enjoying each other's company. No other stresses, no tensions apart from what to do for the day (in our case where to eat). I loved it and I love him. I also think this is why Honeymoons are important, they help the couple bond as a couple. To understand what they mean to each other and how they think about certain things. I've not had this time with SO in a really long time. We try on weekends and stuff but the growing together takes some concerted time and bonding.
And so now, we're an 'us'. We have opinions, we have likes and dislikes, we also have fights but at least 'we' exist.
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