Who's yer daddy?

Have you ever felt let down by the blogs you read because they're not updated too frequently? I've always known that I'm voyeuristic and blogs are a wonderful way to satisfy my need to probe into other people's lives. Yet from time to time they clam up, or do nothing exciting or say nothing interesting. Is this fair? As bloggers who know they have visitors and blurkers... how dare they?

:) Fortunately I have no such pressures personally but am generally a bit bored. There's something about having work and knowing that you will and can do it... and just not wanting to. Maybe it's just chronic laziness in my case. I like my work, some parts of it are even interesting and yet there's the need to procrastinate. Notice that I call it a need, not an urge. I'm too far gone! Help!!

What was that again?

I wanted to post but I'm not sure why. There was some amount of restlessness. Thoughts that just wanted to get out and weren't finding suitable expression. I logged in and opened this page but then got down to work (which I was avoiding by planning to post) and forgot :)

Maybe that's what I was looking for, a distraction to remind me of why I'm here.

Life and Times

The past two weeks have been... interesting. Last week this time SO was with me and I had a car. Today I have neither. It's weird to go from a long distance relationship to a normal relationship back to a distance thing. I'm sure I didn't make it easy for poor SO fighting with him yesterday. The issues with living alone and then actually trying to share my life and work.

Before this, I lived with other people but didn't share any of my work except cooking. We would each do our own washing and ironing and folding and such like. So there were no questions of things not being done the way I like them. I guess overall 2005 was just hard. I was very angry with him for the most part of it. I'm still a bit angry with him but much less now. Hopefully he'll make it to my city for 2 months at a strech later (as is presently planned).

I always believed that I'd want to share my life with someone. That's still true but I've learnt about myself that it's a very 'here and now' sharing. If I want you around and you're not, there's a price to be paid. Of course, this only happens with SO, with my other friends I'm absolutely fine. Maybe it's been so long since I've been with SO that I've forgotten that I was always like that with him. Or maybe I'm just nuts.